Relationship Cool-Off

Do you have a significant relationship with your phone? Most of us do. They say it triggers the same center in your brain that addictions do. Yikes.

Have you had conversations with friends and co-workers and you know they are not listening?

Does your phone pull you?

Does the barrage of calls, texts, tweets, and emails leave you in a constant state of distraction?

Do you feel half there, never fully engaged?

Are you feeling dizzy with overwhelm?

I am.

At work, do you feel like you are a broken record and have to repeat yourself because your message didn’t go through the first time?

Have you slammed on your breaks because someone was looking at their phone while driving?

Have you skirted around someone on the sidewalk because they were looking down at their phone?

Have your emails gotten so overwhelming in volume that you are more and more neglectful every day. Are you missing important communication?

We are all guilty as charged.

More forgetful lately? Guilty as charged.

More and more people are advocating for a break up or re-evaluation of this relationship. And I do too.

This relationship begins to affect our human relationships. That is the important take away.

Life passes us by. There are smells and tastes and people and views and adventures and experiences waiting for us. Don’t let your love affair with your phone interfere.

All relationships require focus and work. And they can be exhausting.

We are a tired society. Constant stimulation from our technology contributes to our stress and overload.

I am beginning to wonder….is being tired now equal to being human? I hope not!

But I bet you know all this. And perhaps you don’t even have time to read this post!

Jordan Bates of HighExistence says this: We’ve reached a stage of capitalism in which an enormous war is raging—a war to capture your attention. Your attention is someone else’s paycheck. Click here to read further.

Here are some suggestions for boundary setting with your phone:

📲 no need to sleep with this partner. Turn your phone off and charge it in another room.

📲 no phones at meals. Just find a basket or drawer. Everyone put their electronics away. Eat, breathe and enjoy.

📲 go about your day without your phone “on” you. Put it in your purse, backpack, or desk drawer. Look around at the world in front of you instead. Breathe in your surroundings.

📲 read the news from a newspaper or magazine. Wow. Such an old fashioned idea. But it is one way to decrease screen time.

📲 take note how many times you reach for your phone. We do it out of habit. Habits can be changed, with intention.

📲 make a phone check-in schedule. This will reduce idle surfing and give you more time in the day.

📲 highly recommended to take vacations without your phone on. Only use for emergencies and the very occasional checking in.

📲 list 10 of your favorite activities. Do more of these. Schedule them. Replace some of your screen time.

📲 engage in the community more. Find Meetups you resonate with or other social gatherings.

📲 start small. Even if you choose one of these options it is a step in the right direction.

If anything, become aware of your attachment.

I don’t know that a total break up is necessary. So, I suggest implementing new boundaries with your phone friend. Afterall, our phones are super handy. They just don’t need to be our primary relationship in life.

Free yourself. Find time for humans and real experiences.

The world is literally in our hands now, but it does not need to control us.

Search for happiness in lack of stimulation……

Can we do it? I think so!

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Relationship Cool-Off — 6 Comments

  1. I am definitely an addict. One of my problems is that I use it for photography a lot (and don’t have any real plan to change that) and then of course end up looking at other stuff. And I often have a photo on my phone I am using to paint from. So tricky. But definitely worth thinking about!

  2. Spot on. There’s a new setting on the most recent Iphone update called Screen Time which allows you to select apps which “go dark” during certain hours of the day. I’ve found it to be a fantastic reminder when my automatic response is to open my phone — I set it to prevent me from doing so in the morning and evening, like an hour before and after I wake up. There are also other apps you can download that do the same.

  3. Love this. A much needed tip list, especially around the holidays, where we are all crazed enough as it is! I’m going to try to do ONE of these things, and hope it leads to another and another. Thanks for the post!

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